Fucking hell, some good news re my life stuffs:

I GET TO KEEP MY JOB WHEN I MOVE TO PORTLAND. 

I am so happy. They won’t let me work more hours, it’s only 15, which isn’t my favorite thing, I was hoping for 20, but still. I can work from home, structure it around schoolwork, and I don’t have to work in customer service anymore. 

I might cry. I hate customer service so much do you know what this means ughhhhhh I am so happy. 

Also wheeee this is amazing if I can keep doing this job for the next two years while I finish school I will have solid history of job experience doing copy editing, and that might actually make it possible for me to get a job I want when I graduate. 

It’s a shame that the possibility of my actually being successful is so wonderful and novel to me, but I have felt like an epic failure life goal wise for the past few years, so…I am just so happy and really, really lucky I have this. 

I’m going to bitch about a thing for a sec.

I am SO annoyed re this one apartment I am trying to rent. 

Okay, so last tuesday I drove up to look at a different place first, and this apartment second. I had asked the woman if she could send me the application before I came up, so I could have it filled out. She didn’t, but, okay, not the end of the world. 

I saw it, liked it, and she gave me an application. I said I’d have Mike and I fill it out, and I’d scan it and email it back to her the next day. I also had brought with me a check and printed copies of both my own and Mike’s last two pay stubs. 

So I fill out the applications, go to my grandparents and use their scanner (because who fucking has a scanner), and email them back the next day. 

On Sunday, she emails me asking me to fill out a form approving a credit check, and scan a copy of my license. 

Ooookay, I’ll go back to my grandparents and do that. I print it, fill it out, scan both things, and email them back. 

Yesterday she emails me, asking me to call her. She says since Mike makes more money, he’d be the primary one on the lease, and so what she really needs is HIS license and form. 

Are you fucking kidding me??

So, we do that and I email it to her this morning. 

I just got an email from her saying that we don’t qualify based on income, which has to be 3x the amount of rent. 

Which is really fucking odd because Mike makes 5,000 a month, so not including mine, that is well over the income requirements. The apartment is 1,200 a month. Math. 

So I call her and tell her this, and she says she thought he only made 2,500. MOTHERFUCKER that is the amount PER PAYCHECK. Of which we both make TWO a month. That’s why I gave you the last TWO paychecks. They have dates on them. And he put his yearly salary on the application. Are you actually a moron and are you fucking kidding me?? 

So now she apparently has to go back to the management company she is working through, blah blah blah. 

If it wasn’t in such a good area and if there was ANYTHING else good in our price range available I’d say fuck it, you are an actual idiot and I don’t want to rent from you. 

A message from Anonymous
How did you describe the bangs you wanted to your hair dresser? I love them and want similar ones for myself!

Thank you! Basically I made a pinterest board of pictures I liked, which were mostly Zooey Deschanel, a few of Brigitte Bardot, and a couple of Alexa Chung. I think Zooey’s bangs are the best way to visually describe it to a hairstylist. 

I asked for them to start pretty deep, since I like them full and thick and not at all wispy. It’s a blunt, straight across bang, but the ends are tapered down so they are longer. Ask your hairstylist not to blend the bangs in with your layers around your face too, there should be a dramatic length difference.

I also mentioned that I like a split, but a lot of that is in the styling. But maybe mention that part, because what my hairstylist did is cut them a bit long, so that when I style them and brush them out of my eyes, the split happens. If I was to wear them straightened and flat they would be in my eyes. 

Also, a lot is in how I style them. I use a round brush and blow dry them in the direction I want them. Don’t use a straightener—seriously. If your hair is curly enough that a round brush/blow dryer won’t get them straight enough, this probably won’t work out like mine do anyway. A straightener makes the ends too straight (obviously) and just makes them kind of flat. 

blondebarbells:

wiseandfeisty:

Someone gave these to me at a bar because I said like comics apparently. I don’t remember saying it but I was yelling loudly about wanting a muscular Wonder Woman.
Uhh Joanna blondebarbells any help here? I only know dc/vertigo.
Also these aren’t comics. What are you giving me strange bar people.
Also I’m drunk so there’s that.
And I almost confronted a guy who was being super loud and douchey and wearing a batman shirt about his thoughts re Jeff Loeb and Tim Sale because I love them together and I wanted to give him a taste of his own shitty medicine and quiz him on his validity as a comic reader, random nerd man. Thankfully my bitchy ness was talked down by a friend. I’m terrible.
Basically when I am drunk I am a peach.

I’ve never seen those before- they look like book books- no pictures.
Also did they bring these to the bar just for you, or did they like, have these in their bag or something?

Right, they’re just…books. Captain America and Hulk books lol. 
I wanted them to be comics, why are they not comics. I mean obviously don’t get me wrong I enjoy book books lol but if they are comic characters I’d rather just, you know, read comics. 
And uhh no hahaha they weren’t for me specifically, the bar we were at does bingo night with donated prizes and one of the bartenders overheard me talking about comics (I think) and gave them to me. I’m assuming that’s where they came from.

blondebarbells:

wiseandfeisty:

Someone gave these to me at a bar because I said like comics apparently. I don’t remember saying it but I was yelling loudly about wanting a muscular Wonder Woman.

Uhh Joanna blondebarbells any help here? I only know dc/vertigo.

Also these aren’t comics. What are you giving me strange bar people.

Also I’m drunk so there’s that.

And I almost confronted a guy who was being super loud and douchey and wearing a batman shirt about his thoughts re Jeff Loeb and Tim Sale because I love them together and I wanted to give him a taste of his own shitty medicine and quiz him on his validity as a comic reader, random nerd man. Thankfully my bitchy ness was talked down by a friend. I’m terrible.

Basically when I am drunk I am a peach.

I’ve never seen those before- they look like book books- no pictures.

Also did they bring these to the bar just for you, or did they like, have these in their bag or something?

Right, they’re just…books. Captain America and Hulk books lol. 

I wanted them to be comics, why are they not comics. I mean obviously don’t get me wrong I enjoy book books lol but if they are comic characters I’d rather just, you know, read comics. 

And uhh no hahaha they weren’t for me specifically, the bar we were at does bingo night with donated prizes and one of the bartenders overheard me talking about comics (I think) and gave them to me. I’m assuming that’s where they came from.

Hi hi 

So this is all yesterday; I ate many boring foods, got a drink several drinks with my friend, and met a cat. 

Foods: 

  • Breakfast: pb and jelly protein oatmeal, it was so weird. I used to make good protein oats what am I doing wrong??
  • Lunch: chicken with pesto
  • Dinner: cottage cheese with jam, stupid freezer vegetables. I really really need to get groceries. 
  • Dinner part 2: manhattens. 

Also me looking like girly james dean. 

50 shades of done with that

healthynic:

Haha he was a nice guy all along he just needed someone to love him!!!!

wiseandfeisty wanna go see the movie together?! ;)

Hahahaha

I hate it I hate it

There is more crying in those fucking books than I think I have cried, ever, in my life

Such codependent, many emotional 

(very, very minimal interesting sex) 

Also I agreed to looking into starting a feminist porn company

So there’s that

Someone gave these to me at a bar because I said like comics apparently. I don’t remember saying it but I was yelling loudly about wanting a muscular Wonder Woman. 

Uhh Joanna blondebarbells any help here? I only know dc/vertigo. 

Also these aren’t comics. What are you giving me strange bar people. 

Also I’m drunk so there’s that. 

And I almost confronted a guy who was being super loud and douchey and wearing a batman shirt about his thoughts re Jeff Loeb and Tim Sale because I love them together and I wanted to give him a taste of his own shitty medicine and quiz him on his validity as a comic reader, random nerd man. Thankfully my bitchy ness was talked down by a friend. I’m terrible. 

Basically when I am drunk I am a peach.

Someone gave these to me at a bar because I said like comics apparently. I don’t remember saying it but I was yelling loudly about wanting a muscular Wonder Woman.

Uhh Joanna blondebarbells any help here? I only know dc/vertigo.

Also these aren’t comics. What are you giving me strange bar people.

Also I’m drunk so there’s that.

And I almost confronted a guy who was being super loud and douchey and wearing a batman shirt about his thoughts re Jeff Loeb and Tim Sale because I love them together and I wanted to give him a taste of his own shitty medicine and quiz him on his validity as a comic reader, random nerd man. Thankfully my bitchy ness was talked down by a friend. I’m terrible.

Basically when I am drunk I am a peach.

Today

Is hot as balls and I have even more hoops to jump through for this godforsaken fucking apartment and jesus h christ I am exhausted by this week already and I don’t even know why, it’s just a million little stresses. 

Finding a place via distance, and trying to ensure that I keep my job when I move, and coordinating camping this weekend, and finding out my friend who took over my lease isn’t renewing…ugh. 

It’s all passing. Nothing bad has happened, it’s all going to work out fine, but it was just this crushing Monday full of little details that you can’t quite hammer out neatly all at once because they rely on other people and just simply waiting. 

But, however, that does mean today is a great day to skip running and go drink a manhattan with my friend. 

(I did yoga/bike today and still ate good foods so I am being only semi naughty.)